Friday Reflections...And Some Change Will Do Me Good

Today I'm reflecting on the week that was, but I also can't let this post go by without a preview of some changes on the horizon.

First, though, the things I am grateful for this week:

:: A wonderful trip to New Jersey last weekend. I saw old friends, laughed and reminisced, spent time with my in-laws, had some one-on-one time with Caroline, spent a fun-filled day exploring New York City and thoroughly enjoyed a few days away from chores and technology.



:: The successful completion of a very vigorous rock scrambling adventure in New York state. The location is at Lake Mohonk and after hiking about 2 miles to the start of the rock scrambling, we then spent the next hour and 15 minutes (or more) climbing over, under, down and around huge rocks and boulders of all shapes and sizes.



We squeezed into areas I never thought possible and there are really no words to properly describe the adventure. There were some intense moments, but it was exhilirating and fun and quite empowering. The views at the end were worth the journey.



:: Those who listen when I'm having a tough day. We all need those people we can truly count on in our daily lives.

:: The friends of my children whom I truly enjoy having around. The ones who are polite and friendly and genuinely good kids. The ones who say what they mean and mean what they say. It's such a pleasure to see my children have friends like that.

:: A less hectic schedule for the kids this summer. Daily swim club from 7-9 three mornings a week for the past two years was rough, but the girls decided to take a break from it this year and have a more low-key summer. Each of them has a week of camp (overnight band camp for Annie, creative writing day camp for Caroline and YMCA day camp for Theo) and a couple small activities here and there, but we are going to be all about fun and relaxation as a family this summer.

:: Our two dogs who make me feel like the most important person on Earth every time I walk in the door. What would I do without them? I can't imagine walking into an empty house with no dogs there to greet me with a chew toy and say "welcome home" with a wag of their tail.



:: Sunshine, warmer temperatures, veggies growing in the garden, a spontaneous family game of kickball in the backyard, the smell of freshly cut grass...in other words, the full-blown arrival of spring, with summer just around the bend

And now for the second part of my post. There are changes in the air right now for me and I'm really excited about them. First, I was selected as the Milwaukee Parenting Examiner for examiner.com. I've only written my first article so far due to my trip to New Jersey, but expect to see more in the very near future. I see this as a great opportunity to get some of my writing online so that I can use them as examples for future freelance assignments I plan to pursue.

I've also been asked by a friend from high school whom I reconnected with on Facebook if I would take her wedding photos for her. She's having a small wedding in June and I am really thrilled that she felt my photos were impressive enough to ask me to photograph her wedding. I've also offered to photograph another friend's new baby and her two big brothers as a baby gift to give me some added practice with newborn baby photos. I don't know what the future holds for me in regard to photography but I have such an intense passion for it and if I could turn that into something I could do even as a part-time career and bring joy to others with my photos, I would be thrilled.

I feel like these opportunities have presented themselves for a reason and I am just going with the flow and looking forward to finding out what it all might mean for the future. This is what I've been waiting for, after a 2008 spent trying to figure out what I wanted to do with my life, this year seems to be a year for action and risk-taking and being open to every opportunity that comes my way.

Perhaps the craziest thing I've decided to take on is a women's fitness boot camp! I start on Monday and it meets 4 days a week from 5:30 to 6:30 in. the. morning. Yes, you heard me. Now anyone who knows me well knows that I am a night owl. I feel like a child if I go to bed before 10:30 and 11:30 is a much more common bedtime for me. I'm going to be waking up at about 4:45 a.m. to get to boot camp on time. Um, the only time I EVER get up that early is to use the bathroom and promptly go back to bed. I usually get up somewhere between 6:20 and 7:00. 4:45 and I have never been properly introduced, but apparently we're going to get to know each other quite well. The agreement I signed when I registered for boot camp includes remembering to set my alarm and being there on time (not always my strong suit) or face a penalty of 20 push-ups. My one saving grace is that since starting Body Pump in January, I can do a lot more push-ups than I used to, but who really wants to do 20 of them in front of the rest of the class, right? This boot camp is about a lot of things to me...fitness and continuing my mission toward being the healthiest I've been in years, but also pushing my own personal boundaries, testing my limits, doing things I didn't think I could do. I will certainly be sharing the boot camp journey on my blog so I hope you'll come along for the ride. And I promise you don't have to get up at 4:45 in the morning to do it, either. You just check in whenever the mood strikes.

Here's hoping you have much to be grateful for this week and that you're pushing your own personal boundaries in some area of your life as well. If not, why not? It's what keeps life interesting.

Friday Reflections

It's time for Friday Reflections and I will be brief today because I am swamped with things to do. I am heading out to New Jersey with my middle daughter tomorrow to visit my in-laws and see some old friends and I am really looking forward to it.

Today, I am grateful for...

:: The opportunity to see old friends this weekend...because I know there will be a lot of laughter and reminiscing and who doesn't love that?

:: Feeling comfortable about visiting my in-laws without my husband. How many people can say that?

:: Special one-on-one time with Caroline, who is a completely different child when she's alone. She is always funny and creative and engaging, but when she isn't with her siblings, she is also more relaxed and easygoing and comfortable in her own skin. Aren't we all a little different when we don't feel like we're competing with anyone else?

:: The fact that I work well under pressure because I've barely packed a thing and we leave bright and early tomorrow, but I know it will all get done.

::The beautiful summer-like weather we had most of this week. It's been a nice preview of things to come.

:: My thriving gardens! Some of the seeds we planted have started to emerge as plants and it's so exciting to watch that transformation.

:: A husband who takes a crazy last-minute idea I have and works together with me to make it happen. We decided at 1:00 on Sunday afternoon to tear down a huge part of the kids' playset that they no longer use, lay down landscaping fabric, spread mulch and move the trampoline to that area and we completed the whole project in 7 hours. It looks great!



:: The soldiers who fought and died for our country and those who continue to protect us as we honor them on Memorial Day

Wishing you a wonderful holiday weekend spent with the ones you love!

Striving for Balance

I’m kicking myself right now. I’m sitting in the amazing tree house that my husband built for our children. I love it up here. The breeze is blowing through the screens on the windows and I see nothing but trees in front of me. As you can see from the photo, our tree house has several comforts of home.

What I love even more are the things it does NOT have: internet (well, I actually could get it up here but I’m pretending I can’t), television, phones, appliances of any kind. There are no interruptions up here. No annoying phone calls to ask if I want my carpets cleaned for free, no temptations to catch up on a t.v. show or see what’s happening on Facebook or throw in a load of laundry instead of giving myself permission to write.

And that is why I’m kicking myself. A few hours ago, I was determined to get into the tree house to write. But then I realized I hadn’t had lunch yet. And while I was having lunch, I may as well finish the season finale of “Lost” (finally). Oh, and I needed to empty the dishwasher and clean up the kitchen and catch up on a couple blogs. Oh yeah, and I needed to respond to a couple emails and figure out what I need to pack for my trip this weekend and take care of some other odds and ends around the house. And the next thing you know it’s 2:45 and I have an hour until the school day ends and the bus arrives. The evening craziness will ensue and before I know it, another day will be done.

Time management has never been my strength. I can find ways to stall or avoid an unpleasant task as well as anyone. I spread myself too thin and then struggle to keep up. I don’t allow myself enough time to get certain things done and then I have to rush. It’s a vicious cycle and frankly, it’s one I hate. But these habits are so ingrained that it can be very difficult to just let them go and create new patterns. I always get the jobs done, but at what price to my well-being?

But here’s the biggest kick in the pants of all. Like I said, I get the jobs done. But so often the “me time” I take doesn’t feel like quality “me time” when I reflect back on it. It’s a gorgeous day here. I’m home alone without any people to interrupt me. I wanted to go to the tree house and write. Yet I did all those other things instead and now I’m annoyed with myself because I've only left myself an hour to write. So what if I have to empty the dishwasher or throw in that load of laundry later instead of right now? Or if I don’t get to watch the rest of “Lost” until the next rainy day? Would it be the end of the world if I didn’t know what my friends were doing on Facebook today? There is so much more peace and focus to be found when I step away from the chores and the technology when the mood strikes me instead of waiting until EVERYTHING ELSE is done. Because you know what? Everything else will NEVER be done. Just when you think the whole house is clean, the cycle starts again. Just when you think the emails are all caught up, you get five more.

What it really comes down to is priorities and finding balance. For example, I love Twitter. I have found a wealth of writing resources and information and even inspiration there. But sometimes I see all these writers posting there on a very regular basis and I wonder “When do they write?” “How do they get it all done?” “Who is cleaning their bathrooms??” True balance eludes me. There are books and courses on the subject. There are people who profess to have found it. It's something I crave in my life. I don’t mean the ability to be all things to all people with myself on the bottom of that list. I've been there, done that and it isn’t working. I mean balancing those things I MUST do with the things I deeply WANT to do, like writing, reading, photography and continuing to get more physically fit with a little technology tossed in (like Twitter, Facebook, t.v., etc) when time allows…REALLY allows.

So I have an idea. Summer is almost upon us. The kids have about 15 days left of school. Summer is what I call “forced relaxation”. The chores are still there and the internet is still there and all the other distractions of life, but so are my three kids. And I want to enjoy them, so suddenly those other things begin to take a back burner. What I really need to do is adopt that philosophy when school is in session, too. My kids are my priorities and during the school year, writing and photography and physical fitness need to be my priorities during those school hours…not chores and technological distractions. I can’t reach my goals and dreams by continuing to put them last on the list “after everything else is done”.

I’m going to use this summer as a mental shift. Everybody will help with chores (something they already do, but not enough in my opinion) and computer time will be limited (for everyone) so that the majority of our days can be spent doing things we love. We’ve already limited our extra-curricular activities this summer to a minimal amount so that we don’t spend our days running from place to place. We won’t ignore the things that need to be done, but we will push aside the things that don’t so the priorities that bring us joy aren’t lost in the shuffle. With any luck, three months of changing that mindset will help to put new habits in place that will continue into the fall and winter and I will be that much closer to finding that sought-after balance.

What do you do to achieve balance in your life and how do you overcome the struggles? I would love your feedback in the comments.

It's All About the 'Tude

Gratitude, that is. I'm going to start a new weekly feature on my blog every Friday to reflect on the things that made me grateful and/or happy during the week. I'm a strong believer in gratitude and taking time to recognize those things we are grateful for on a regular basis. Gratitude looks different to everyone and might be recognized through writing in a journal, meditation, blogging, creating something, prayer, thinking about what you're grateful for while driving in the car or taking a shower or any number of other ways. The important thing isn't how you express your gratitude but just simply that you do.

In our busy lives, it can be so easy to focus on complaints, annoyances and frustrations and while venting can be therapeutic at times (believe me, sometimes it works for me!), I always feel better when I take a deep breath and tell myself some of the things I am blessed to have in my life. So without further ado, here are some things I'm grateful for this week:

:: A husband who can build or fix anything and made me these amazing raised garden beds for Mother's Day


:: Three healthy children who helped me plant vegetables in those garden beds, dressed in special clothes and lit candles for a wonderful Mother's Day dinner and give the world's best hugs


:: A good book that can keep my interest while I work out on the elliptical machine for an hour


:: A cavity-free dental check-up for all three kids

:: A daughter who is confident and comfortable in her new glasses


:: The variety of birds that visit our feeder throughout the day and a special visit from a Baltimore oriole this week (a bird we rarely see at our house). I'll never forget a day last summer when I was talking about one and Theo (then 6) thought I said "Valdemort Oreo". Sounds like a new Harry Potter product to me!

:: The bike path that runs past the back of our house and gets a lot of use by our family.


:: My health and the health of my family. This week we found out that Steve's uncle (age 59) has terminal cancer and those kinds of discoveries just make you want to appreciate every single day with your loved ones.

:: The lush greenery now filling in the woods in our backyard and the flowering trees I see everywhere I go.

:: A visit to Barnes and Noble all by myself, albeit a brief one this week.

:: Hugs from Theo's classmates when I come in to help his teacher.

:: The sound of the ice cream truck on a warm spring afternoon


:: Caroline's sense of humor and creativity while performing with some of her fellow students in a special talented and gifted presentation on Monday

:: Listening to Annie play her clarinet so beautifully and the wonderful comments from her band teacher when I helped at her school this week

:: The joy and enthusiasm from my children when they find out my younger sister, Wendy, is coming for a visit. Wendy has special needs but they just see her as their friend and playmate. If only Wendy knew the impact she has had on so many people by teaching them about love and acceptance through her pure heart and trusting soul.

What are you grateful for this week? I'd love to hear from you in the comments.

I Think I Need the Force

Picture this: I'm sitting at the desk, brainstorming ideas for some writing I was planning to do. Theo approaches and begins lining up his Star Wars action figures along the edge of the desk. (I'm not too alarmed at this point because he likes to play with his action figures beside me and ask to me watch things he's doing from time to time if I'm working at the computer.) Suddenly, his FATHER...yes, my HUSBAND...grabs the Nerf ball gun and begins shooting down the guys, hitting me repeatedly in the process. Theo thinks this is hysterical and he grabs his Star Wars clone trooper gun, armed with a foam dart, and shoots down some of the action figures as well. They both erupt in a fit of laughter as I protest these impossible working conditions. They do this again and AGAIN. Aim, shoot the action figures, shoot Mom a few times in the process, repeat. I ask you...how am I supposed to accomplish anything in these impossible working conditions? Only the force could've helped me tonight. My only defense was to grab my camera and record the evidence. They are so lucky they're cute.